Bloggers Take the Bloom off the Rose

Only incrementally better than having your door kicked in by Bloomberg stormtroopers, our new near-Chinatown club suffered the embarrassment of being asked to spread for the very first time since it opened its classy doors a game that to deal is a novelty, to know is to hate and to play is to suffer.

Yes, that's right, we got a New York club to spread Razz.

Granted the place only opened a month ago, but I'm going to go out on a limb and speculate that had 4 1/4 bloggers (FTrain, Bobby Bracelet, Derek and the Rooster--since I've only been blogging from since the beginning of the month, I'll count myself a quarter) plus FTrain's friend Ferrari not descended on the hapless location last night after downing a nice bottle of Barolo in Little Italy, they may well have avoided the indignity indefinitely.

The 3-6 Razz session was not the most profitable for yours truly, as I sunk $100 into as many bricks as the club had exposed on its walls (hint: they have a lot of wall space). Frankly, however, I was outgunned in those waters and escaped relatively unscathed only because I was fortunate enough to avoid the fate that befell one hapless fellow.

In perhaps the hand of the night, we saw the power of a move only known to top Razz players, known by the cognoscenti as "the Rooster" and by its victims as "the Cock". The trick is to wait until you're showing paint on 3rd street. The typical player in this situation would meekly fold or, holding decent unders, perhaps hope to sneak in the pot for the bring-in.

But that's not how you pull a Rooster. No, to pull a Rooster, you must bide your time till the betting gets around to you. Then, if any poor sap named after a sports car has completed, RAISE-EM UP!

Nicely hooked, now all you have to do is bet, raise and re-raise through 4th, 5th and 6th street, catching paint once more along the way. Finally, hit your 6,5,4,2,A on the river and sweep the capped pot on 7th street from Mr. Fishy who somehow thought his 6,5,4,3,A was good.

Super props to the club, not only did they spread Razz for us, they gave us a dealer for two hours, let us rotate through Razz, O8 and limit 4-8 without even charging time. Notwithstanding my genuine grieving over Playstation, this place rocks.

When the club looked like it was going to lose its other table, we offered to switch ours to 1-2NL and bring over the two last players. That did manage to save the night for me as I've refined my strategy for taking money from bloggers, or at least Yankee-fan bloggers. Basically, it involves turning quad 9s. It's a tricky play, but I do recommend giving it a shot now and then.

Finally, we determined that the computer hand, affectionately renamed "queen shit", is pretty damn good as it took 3 pots in 2 orbits.